Redundancy and Unnecessary Repetition
written August 2008
People who are superfluous and unnecessarily repeat things bother me. Not only that, but in addition, individuals who are redundant annoy me. To go over your ideas and repeat your thoughts once youíve spoken your mind or made your point is excessively verbose. Itís unnecessarily wordy. You donít need to say whatís already been said using different words; itís irritating. Itís needless to paraphrase yourself; itís irksome. Itís pointless to restate something already mentioned; it becomes tiresome. If I want to read an idea, it would be best in a concise format. When I want to digest a concept, it would be ideal to read words that are written in a more focused manner. You should trim it up. Make it short and to the point. Be terse with your words, and also try to be succinct too. As well as you know how, you should summarize to the best of your ability, because nobody likes a long-winded piece that goes on and on, abundant with reiterations and rife with similar statements.
However, if youíre a female, girl, woman, or are otherwise overburdened with estrogen, you may find this hard and difficult. If you find that you menstruate regularly, this may not be an easy notion to grasp. Moreover, if you have ovaries, these concepts might prove to be quite a challenge. Talking excessively will be your natural forte, and since you never have novel ideas or original thoughts, the only way you seem to know how to speak is in surplus, through needless reverberation. And since those of you with drama inducing hormones may find verbal simplicity a strange and foreign concept, the best course of action for you gossipy sacks of emotion would be to have your vocal chords removed. Take out your voice box. Bite your tongue. Become mute. And in the same light, it would probably be best if you never utilized written word again either. So chop off your fingers. Toss your computer out the window. Throw all pencils and paper into a wood chipper. Also, you should try to associate manual dexterity with nausea so that youíll never be tempted to communicate with your hands in any way, shape, or form without wanting to vomit as well, too.
To wrap up, you women usually have too much to say more often than not. You talk all the time. We get it. We understand. But guess what. Nobody cares. So do us all a favor and shut the fuck up. Help our sanity and be quiet. Or die. Give up the ghost.
Also, I would like to extend my deepest gratitude for your understanding. I appreciate it.
As an afterthought: Iím trying a new, interactive approach to writing that will include the readers in a more proactive role. Count the number of times I was redundant or repetitive in this post, add up the total, tally the sum, and email me at firstname.lastname@example.org with your figure or the number you came up with. The winner gets to choose the next topic I write about after this one.
- People You Should Hate
- People You Should Hate - Part 2
- Drivers You Should Hate
- Sexist Jokes Annotated
- Sex and the City Quotes Foster Stupidity
- Poker, Driving, and Sex - Everyone's an Expert